The Threesies

Written for a Storytelling & Bookmaking field trip with Ms. Dewald's 2nd-grade class from PS 131

5/17/06

Once there was a 20-year-old girl named Andie Candyshop. She was a skeleton with red hair. Spiders lived in her hair, mice were all over her hair, and red slime came out of her eyes. Most of her clothes were made out of boogers, especially her favorite bright green dress. Andie was very popular and rich.

Andie lived in a huge, creepy, haunted shoe, with ghosts living in the walls. She was married to a mummy named Bazooka and a vampire named Palooka. Palooka loved to dance like Michael Jackson. (Bazooka was too stiff to dance.)

One day, Andie, Bazooka and Palooka were having breakfast. Suddenly, they started to smell something, kind of like rotten eggs mixed with smoke. Andie fainted dead away. So did Bazooka the mummy.

"Oh my dear!" cried Palooka, moonwalking over to Andie. "What's happening?" He covered his nose and started to do the robot.

When he reached the front door, he looked outside and saw a giant foot coming down toward their shoe house.

"A giant someone wants to try on our shoe!" Palooka didn't know what to do. Then he got an idea. For a long time, he had been jealous of Bazooka, and he thought that if he saved Andie, she would like him better than that dummy mummy.

But how could he do it? He had big vampire teeth, so he decided to climb up to the top of the giant and start biting. It was a long climb, but when he got to the giant's head, he bit and bit and bit.

The giant, whose name was George, was very surprised. He fell down and said, "Uh." Another giant ran over to George.

"Are you all right, sir?" the second giant asked. George was very angry.

"Doesn't this Footlocker have any sneakers that don't have tiny vampires in them? Preferably Jordans?"

"Of course, sir," replied the other giant. "Right this way."

Palooka ran back into the house and straight to Andie, who was still unconscious. He didn't see Bazooka anywhere (Bazooka was hiding under the bed).

"Andie my dear!" Palooka cried as Andie opened her eyes. "Did you see me knock down the giant?"

"Yes I did," sighed Andie. "I was having an out-of-body experience and I saw the whole thing. You're my hero!"

She gave Palooka a big, wet kiss.

At this, Bazooka the mummy came out from under the bed and got out his suitcase.

"We're through!" he hollered, throwing his extra wrappings into the case. "I don't want to be a third wheel."

"Bazooka!" cried Andie. "Don't leave! I still love you more than Palooka!"

Then, Palooka began to dance. He did some freestyle and the robot.

Andie felt bad. She couldn't decide who she loved more...